Causes and Cures for Heterosexuality
By: Dani Langevin – December 2012
I was doing some research on religious scripture to find out how various beliefs address issues like war, homosexuality and prejudice. As often happens in my research, I stumble upon something that grabs me and I must run with it. I came across an article by Lambert Dolphin, a Christian phycisist, entitled Jesus and the Homosexual. I thought it might be about Jesus being a homosexual. After all, he did run around with twelve other men and in September, Karen King, Harvard’s Hollis professor of divinity, revealed that she has a 1,600 year old papyrus fragment that may prove Jesus and Mary Magdalene were husband and wife, a claim that the Catholic Church adamantly denies. Why? I think it would give a new depth to Jesus that had long been ignored. Does the Church know something we do not? Was Jesus a homosexual and that’s why there was no way he would have taken a wife? I have to think I’m making many readers uncomfortable and angry wonder how many will continue reading. I digress.
While reading Dolphin’s article, I could feel my own anger and discomfort rising at its message. Like many of you reading about the possibility of Jesus being gay, my reaction was quite visceral. I thought it would be fun to rewrite portions of Dolphin’s article, but change some pronouns and descriptors and see how heterosexuals would react to what Dolphin is claiming. Indulge me. Anything in quotes comes directly from his article with just a few key words changed.
“We, as Christians, pay particular attention to the words of our savior. Jesus said nothing regarding heterosexuality, and in his ministry spoke more about the sins of the spirit than the sins of the body. . . Our reading of the Bible in its entirety is one of a loving, forgiving and nurturing God who wants us to help create a world that accepts and empowers all.
“Sexual desire and sexual attraction to all sorts of love-objects-male, female, or inanimate—is a great mystery. It is in part driven by hormones, inherited temperament, and predisposing psychological factors. The stage for growing up straight is apparently set in earliest childhood—most straight men do not feel they had a choice in the matter. They believe that they are not free to change even if they wanted to. Straight men often express a tragic sense of being born into a socially disliked or unacceptable minority group, and compensate for this. To preserve some sense of self-worth they hang around together and form organizations that especially promote Straight Pride and Rights.
“There is a very wide range of masculinity and femininity in society, and few men are either 100% gay or 100% straight. Those men who crusade against heterosexuality and shout the loudest about their own homosexual normalcy are often deceiving themselves about their own secret forbidden proclivities. So the entire subject is complex and the last thing straight men and women need is to be labeled, branded, and stereotyped.
“Research in the past 50 years has shown that all male heterosexuals testify that they had poor relationships with their mothers. . . Boys that fail to identify with and bond with a mother-figure feel uncertain of what it means to be a man. Since the basic problem—inner most need—is for affirmation from members from the opposite sex—for “opposite-sex bonding”—the situation can be radically changed by special attention from and aunt, female role model/teacher, youth leader or caring female friend. Crushes with girls may develop signaling that a deep unmet need exists in the boy who has never felt really loved and affirmed by a mother. Of course dating boys doesn’t help any since uncertainty about one’s own sexuality and lack of self-confidence and hormonally-driven anti-aggressiveness tends to make such dates awkward and unsatisfactory. It is wrong at this stage to label boys as straight. They are predisposed towards becoming heterosexual, but they aren’t there yet.
“It is in their teen-age years that many vulnerable, lonely young men reach out for a close relationship with a female friend or an older female and find themselves deeply responding erotically to that person. Soon our vulnerable youth thinks of himself as straight, identifies with other straight males, and usually comes under the influence of the more active and outspoken members of the straight community. By definition he has become heterosexual because he is now living either a secret or an open heterosexual life-style with regular sexual liaisons.
“In a study of 156 couples, only seven had been able to maintain sexual fidelity. The inherent unsuitability of opposite-sex relationships is seen in the form of fault-finding, irritability, feeling smothered; power struggles, possessiveness, and dominance; boredom, disillusionment, emotional withdrawal, and unfaithfulness.
“Men who experience heterosexual attractions are, unconsciously, trying to recover their mother’s love in the arms of another woman, and women with heterosexual attractions are looking for their father’s love in the arms of another man. Anything that creates a sense of disconnection between a child and his or her opposite gender can cause heterosexuality. This can manifest itself as rejection, real or perceived, from opposite-sex parents or peers, or as some form of sexual molestation.”
Fear not my heterosexual friends, according to the article, straightness can be cured through intense emotional and psychological counseling, deeply emotional relationships with adults of the same sex and physical, non-sexual touching from members of the opposite sex. You all just have to program yourselves to ignore the sexual urges you have for the opposite sex and replace them with a deep seeded love and desire for the same sex. I’m sure this won’t be difficult for any of you. Good luck in your transition.